@1:41 pm
the person who make me stronger.
6 yrs of friendship.
still countin.
{
very much in love =)}
@11:00 pm
A fren of mine
im feelin every part of u the moment u shed e tears..
e disappoinment,hurt n broken u r inside..
how strong ur feeling was..
n e fact that everything were destroyed in juz a split sec..
it wasnt easy..i get it..
n juz remember that THINGS HAPPEN FOR GOOD...
everything tat happen,theres a reason..
every laughter n smile tat were shown..
it was merely an act..
coz deep down,theres sorrow behind it..
it hurt to see the wae u r living now..
the wae u release ur tention by doing something tat u wudnt wana do..
something tat u hate n u dislike..
you noe by doing this, it doesnt help u in any waes..
infact,u r juz making things worse..
dun punish urself for something tat u didnt do..
u have done your part..
by taking good care of her for e past few years..
dun blame urself for wat happen..
coz in e first place,it wasnt your fault..
n wateva tat happen now,its beyond your will..
it takes tyme to recuperate..
it takes tyme to heal..
u have olwaes been strong..
u show me e right path wen i was lost..
u had guided along e wae..
n im glad u did..
u dun need someone to change..
u dun nid love to guide u to e ryte path..
its juz you..
love urself first before u want others to love u..
y am i so concern?
because i juz dunwan you to be hurt..
if u really think that ol this enjoyment u have been doing..
makes u happy..i hv nuthink more to sae..
but i doubt so..this is not u..
this is not e person tat ive known before..
u are better than this..
im concern coz u r a fren of mine..
e same wae wen u guided me for e past few months..
u show me the correct path..
n now i think its ma turn repay..
im juz here to help..
i noe theres nothing much i cud do..
ill be ur listener wen u nid someone to talk to..
ill give u ma shoulder if u nid someone to lean on to..
n shed ol those sorrowness..
im doin this not becoz of anything..
im not hopin for anything..
in doin this coz..
coz U R A FREN OF MINE..
i cant bare to see u cry again..
life doesnt bloom all the tyme..
n sometimes, going thru ol this..
will juz make u a stronger n better person..
"Holdin on to anger is like grasping a hot coal
with the intent of throwing it at someone else;
you are the one who gets burned.”
so yaa..
tats about it..
im juz letting things out here..
n for some ppl..
u may understand this..
but for those who doesnt..
juz stay it tat wae.. =DLabels: care n concern
{
very much in love =)}
@11:37 am
3 more weeks to go.
countin down.
{
very much in love =)}
@12:13 am
6 february 2008
sometimes u juz feel like u nid tyme by urself..
being around friends n chill..
juz wana have a peace of mind..
to let everything out..
n im sure everyone been thru this shit before..
n it happen juz once in awhile..
n i dun ask much..
went out the whole nyte wit THEM..
being selfish to some people?yes i do realise that..
n for SOME ppl..i apologise e trouble tat i did..
for tat period of tyme..
im juz at ma lowest point of tyme..
call me selfish or wateva u wana sae..
i noe im doin things without thingking..
and wateva shit i did..i have ma own reason..
well..do this ppl noe wats really in ma mind?
wat ive been thru?
hmm..nvm..only those who are close will understand..
just coudnt be bothered anymore!!
u juz cant stop ppl from thinking..so juz let them be..
wat else can i do ryte?
yest was tiring but it was not wasted..
went to mit mas,ayul n ol at wawan's dome for their dance prac..
mas n me was waiting for the rest..
we were takin a nap..dun even realised haiqal arrival..
was awake by some irritatin guys under e block..
screaming n singing (out of tune!)some emotional malay songs..
was pissed n decided to go to AP to buy drinks..
met syaza ondeawae..n chill wit her for awhile..
went back to dome to mit e rest..n everyone was there..
ayul was super duper hyper..doin some crappy steps..haa..
hakim n frens came at nyte..chill till 11+pm n some went off..
me,mas,farthu,wawan,hakim n ayul went over to wawan's place..
ordered Mac Delivery..thx to ayul! huhur..
i was kinda down on that period of tyme..but this bunch of ppl juz cheer me up!=D
play games n watch some movies..
well..sad to sae..some shits happen..
and ppl..about Wearing e Tudung..tat was a crazy idea ever hakim..
haahaa..imagine if tat were to happen haa..
the feelin was really scary..i was shivering..n ma heart was beating real fast..
running thru admiralty to woodlands CC ..
we actually ran tat fast..
its worse than amazing race..serious..
mentally n physically tired..
its like we do had fun but at the same it feel sucky...
mixed emotion..
in the end we we decided to chill at multi storey carpark rooftop..
coz thats e 'safest' area...
Ayul and fathu was darn tired n slept..
left wit me,mas,wawan and hakim..
thinking of solutions to some 'problem'
n hakim was making a joke of it..haa..
so yaa..
chill till 7am..
n we won the 'game'..
haaa..scary but ya...
it shoudnt had happen..n deep down i do feel bad lahz..
but sometimes u juz nid tyme by urself to let go of everything..
went off at 7am..tiring but its not wasted..
went straight home..
n ma parents fetch me at SC..
n we went to ma aunt open house till nyte..
n i didnt sleep for 2 daes..hmmm..
darn tired..
and todae(7 feb)..
goin to ma aunts houz again..coz they juz shifted..
gona be there till nyte i guess..
k tats bout it..
will update soon..
=D
adios..
{
very much in love =)}
@2:19 pm
hmmm...5 daes break from school..one word..Heaven..haa..time for a break from ol those numbers..so yaa...life..as normal..simple as it used to be..i think its gettin better in a wae.. but theres some thing that bothers me..but i dont really wana go deep n think too much..im juz following the flow..hmmmmm....god! i love this song! random.wats in ma head now? actually i was thingking..wat is ma next step after ma 2 yrs course..??for some reasons..i need to really work hard..guess i will be working in a bank..but at e same tyme im taking private dip.i dun think i gona stop ma education here..coz wat i have now is not enuf.. Duh!yaaa..it gona take tyme..but its ok..im takin things slow..aniwae its ma life..n i lead them..and everyone have their own road to success..its juz a matter of tyme..and at the same tyme..i have to find ma own money..support ma family and education..life gona be darn buzy after this..and i really hope it will go the wae i plan..and this 5 weeks more to go..im goin for it..hmmm...so yaa..ouh ya..met Andry after school..ingat tak nani?? Andry?? haa..horror! heerandomly..met at bishan interchange..huhur..k he really change alot..haa..maybe bcoz hes happy wit hes tunang..haa..nice to see tat u r leadin a good lyfe ahead...=Dother side of life?hmm..i lie if i were to sae im not affected..but im tryin to stay positive..seriously..im immune..n i dun wana think much...im holdin on to juz one thing..FATE.wats important now is ma future..n how i am gona lead it..haa..k i dunnoe y im sayin this..but i dun wana be hanging..n lead to no where..its a BIG no..im really wana get it over n done with ma exam!!!!n i wana work n work n work..n earn ma own money..seriously..its tyme for me to find ma own money..askin from parents..hmm..i dun think so..im holdin back from gettin a job for this 5 weeks...coz of ma exam..coz i noe if i were to work..there will be no tyme to revise for ma final..so yaa..grrr...5 weeks so near yet so far..n it feel suck wen u r broke..haa.. tired to think of it.dier kater dah malas.ya.Labels: shits happen sometimes
{
very much in love =)}
@4:39 pm
this moment of time.
this attitude is given.
this period of time,im pissed.
And,i cant do anything.
coz this period of time,im nothing.
im tired of ol this shit that was given.
theres a limit for everything.
n im sick of it.
come n go as u wish.
coz i dun give a damn anymore.
im tired of ol this.
this period of time.
i give up.
u wana play this game,den play it urself.
im leadin ma own path now.
be it for good or bad.
{
very much in love =)}
@10:14 am
someone sae : "this is the moment you have to stay strong ziela.."Well..true i might sae..that person is rite..this is the moment where i need to be really really strong..ouh ya..school has been good..exam is juz around the corner.. only 5 more weeks to go to final exam!(take care ziela~)..really nid to lock maself in a room..tie maself on e chair n look straight at ma accounting book till u go nuts..haa.. yea..suffer for a few weeks n let it over n done with.. hmph! its so near yet so far.. ouh ya..randomly went to call MOF jap. restraunt n had an interview wit them at bugis...school end at 1230pm..change n went straight to bugis jucntion..reached around 2pm..but i was told to come at 3+pm coz theres alot of customer..so ya..went to city hall to mit irsyad to take ma cash ..e moment i reached,i received a msg from him..saying he cudnt make it coz he hv to sign some bank loan regardig HDB..grr..but i noe they are selling their houz..n irsyad is their elder son..tats y he nid to sign some documents..so i while killing e time..i walk around city hall from 4 to 5pm..n went back to bugis for e interview.. went for e interview..n amazingly i was asked to start werk on that dae itself..6-11pm..haa..can see they really in need of man power..damn! n u noe wat..from 6-11pm..customer came in non stop..as in seriously non stop for the straight 5 hours.. it was kinda tiring..theres no time for u to even rest..n now ma leg is still painful..i have problem walkin up the stairs due to ma nafa test n e workout n ma work..but its better this wae..rather than chillin around outside and doin nuthink at home..might as well i juz earn some cash for maself..the manager is great..easy to get along with.. Due to lots of customer yest..work ended around 1130pm..wen im walkin home.. ma whole body is like screaming at me to stop walkin.. n tat period of time..i was darn sleepy n lethargic.. but i like it or not..i nid to force maself.. n i dun freakin eat e whole dae(for some reason).. hmm..
k besides that..went to e MRT HOPIN tat i cud rest n have a short nap from city hall to woodlands..BUT!!! E MRT to Marina is over!! I WAS LIKE..ARE U KIDDIN ME?!! not now..wen i gona faint in a minute.. wen i heard tat..i juz went weak.. n i nid to walk again to take 960..n i tell u..it was freakin far to walk to e bustop..n its already 12+AM n im alone.. but im fine wit it..only god knows how i felt yest.. i fuckin pissed to e max..n yea..someone asked me to go to ma aunt houz..what? its not nice to go to someone houz till 1am...wen they are already sleeping.. so yaa..waited for almost 15mins.. i almost weep of tiredness :(..as soon as i took e bus..i doze off..wen i woke up..i cudnt carry maself up..ma whole body was aching..trust me..yest was e worst dae ever.. but i manage to hold on to it..well..shits happen somtimes..
but currently..i made up ma mind..5 more weeks more to final exam..i think i gona concentrate on ma studies first.. n den i can werk e hell out of maself..yea..n im graduatin soon..fun but scary..tyme past really fast.. :S
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all,
even if saving you sends me to heaven.
Cause I'm here, for you
please don't walk away and
please tell me you'll stay, stay..
current mood: confused, pissed, down
y the sudden change?.. im immune~
Labels: messed
{
very much in love =)}
